Faking it
Get well, Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio (2). And thanks for the inspiration. The fabulously nervy fake field goal you called to beat Notre Dame 34-31 in OT convinced The Dash to make this week's column an Ode to Fakery.
From Jay Gatsby to Meg Ryan ("I'll have what she's having"), America has always been fascinated by a good faker. Occasionally we are outraged (see: Jeter, Derek). Sometimes we are saddened, like by Kevin Hart (3), the Nevada high school player who in 2008 fabricated a scholarship offer from California and staged a commitment ceremony.
But we are never bored. Someone who can pull off a really good ruse is not dull.
And quite frankly, until Saturday The Dash was convinced Dantonio was dull. But clearly, underneath that buttoned-down exterior is a man with a gambler's soul. He may not be Chris Petersen (4) when it comes to embracing football gadgetry, but that was as brassy a fake kick as The Dash has seen in college ball.
When Dantonio ordered up "Little Giants," as the pass from holder/punter/former high school quarterback Aaron Bates to tight end Charlie Gantt is called in the Spartans playbook, there had to be a collective puckering on the Spartans sideline.
Given the second-guessing that accompanies every decision in modern football, calls like the one Dantonio made are not easy.
"They're always great when they work," said Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops (5), who has some memorable fake kicks on his résumé. "I've been on the other end, where they don't work and you look like a knucklehead."
And the stress level when you've made such a call, and you're waiting to see it executed?
"Your heart's in your stomach," Stoops said.
Maybe that was the problem for Dantonio, who suffered a mild heart attack after the Notre Dame victory. Fortunately, he is expected to make a full recovery. Unfortunately, his physical problems overshadowed the call of a lifetime.
"I made the call 'Little Giants' and I said a little prayer," Dantonio said Saturday night.
The annexation of East Lansing ensued.
The Dash ranks that play among the coolest fake kicks ever. It didn't carry the weight of the Saints' onside against the Colts in the Super Bowl, but it's worthy of inclusion in the newly constructed Dash Fake Kick Hall of Fame.
Other inductees in the Faker's Hall (style points, stakes, creativity, risk, and impact of the play all are factored in):
Dear Big Ten: All three phases, guys
This has the makings of a good year in the Big Ten. It looks stronger at the top than it has been in quite some time, and solid in the middle as well. But the league has gotten off to a strangely inept start in special teams. Among the many kicking-game problems in the Midwest:
Ohio State (34) ranks 117th nationally in net punting, in no small part because it surrendered an 88-yard punt return for a touchdown against Miami. The Buckeyes also are last in the league in kickoff coverage, in no small part because they gave up a kickoff return touchdown to the Hurricanes as well.
Iowa (35) lost to Arizona on Saturday largely because it gave up a 100-yard kickoff return for a touchdown, had a punt blocked to set up a touchdown and also had an extra point blocked.
Wisconsin (36) surrendered a kickoff-return touchdown to Arizona State and another return to the 1-yard line. At least the Badgers made the tackle there on the final play of the first half, or they would have lost to the underdog Sun Devils. On the positive side, Wisconsin also blocked an extra point in a one-point victory.
Michigan (37) ranks last in America in punt returns. The Wolverines have made just 1 of 5 field goals. And they had a punt blocked Saturday by Massachusetts.
Minnesota (38) gave up a kickoff-return touchdown to USC on Saturday.
With results like that, the rest of America is going to go back to questioning the league's collective speed. If you don't like it, Big Ten, then tackle a kick returner or two in space. Or break a few returns (the league has returned only one punt and one kickoff for scores).
NCAA issues suspensions for North Carolina's Burney, Williams
This is getting very old! Leave these kids alone! Let them play, they have already cost their teammates too much. Sick of this from the NCAA!
RALEIGH, N.C. (AP) -- The NCAA suspended North Carolina defensive back Kendric Burney six games and safety Deunta Williams four games on Wednesday for receiving improper benefits.
Both players must also repay benefits to become eligible, though the school plans to appeal the length of the suspensions.
In a news release, the NCAA said Burney received $1,333 in benefits while Williams received $1,426 in benefits. The school said Burney must repay $575.19 and Williams must repay $450.67 to charities of their choice.
Both players have sat out the first two games for the winless Tar Heels (0-2), which count toward their suspensions. The status of 10 other players remains in question as North Carolina prepares to travel to Rutgers. Among those players are NFL prospects Marvin Austin -- who has been suspended indefinitely for breaking team rules -- and Robert Quinn on defense, top receiver Greg Little and tailback Ryan Houston.
Both Burney and Williams were among six underclassmen who decided to return for their senior seasons instead of entering the NFL draft.
"If and when they come back, they'll certainly be welcome additions," coach Butch Davis said during his radio show Wednesday night. "They're good kids, and certainly you would love to (expedite) a lot of these other things and try to get some kind of resolution as quick as possible, but it's good to kind of get some clarity at least on those two young men."
The NCAA visited Chapel Hill in July focused on whether Austin and Little received improper benefits from agents, but that probe expanded to include possible academic misconduct involving a tutor last month.
Athletic director Dick Baddour called the length of the suspensions "unduly harsh" and hopes to have an appeal heard by next week.
"The timeliness is important and I'm sure the NCAA will work with us to help us get a response as soon as possible," Baddour said.
In a news release, the school said the benefits included trips to California, Atlanta and Las Vegas for Burney, and two trips to California for Williams. Most of the benefits associated with Burney came from someone who the NCAA said qualifies as an agent, while most of Williams' benefits were violations of a rule preventing athletes from receiving "preferential treatment."
A person familiar with the situation told The Associated Press that the person who qualified as an agent in Burney's case is Chris Hawkins. The former North Carolina and Marshall defensive back paid $1,000 for the jersey of Georgia receiver A.J. Green in a transaction that led to Green's recent four-game suspension. The person spoke to the AP on condition of anonymity because the NCAA probe is ongoing.
Page Pate, an Atlanta-based attorney representing Hawkins in a pending drug case, said in an e-mail he had not discussed the issue with his client and had no comment.
Hawkins has said he is a collector, not an agent. Last week, Baddour said Hawkins had been around the players and the program "periodically" over the years, but is no longer welcome around the football facility.
Baddour said the California trips were to visit a former North Carolina player who had befriended both Burney and Williams. Both players paid for their travel, but the NCAA ruled "there were expenses they are still responsible for, and that's what they're paying back."
Thirteen players sat out the opener against LSU, with only tailback Shaun Draughn being cleared from that group so far.
Baddour said the remaining cases are being evaluated individually and are at different stages of the process, though NCAA spokeswoman Stacey Osburn said the governing body has ruled on all reinstatement requests made by the school so far.
"We're as anxious as anybody to get resolution and we're pushing to resolution," Baddour said, "but they're all on a different kind of timetable."
Earlier Wednesday, an attorney for former assistant coach John Blake confirmed that Blake had met with the North Carolina Secretary of State's office in their probe of whether the state's sports agent laws were broken.
Wade Smith, one of Blake's attorneys, said Blake was interviewed in response to a subpoena, though he declined to say when or comment further.
Blake resigned earlier this month after his friendship with California-based agent Gary Wichard came into question amid the NCAA review. Investigators also subpoenaed Austin and interviewed him earlier this month.
A spokeswoman with the Secretary of State's office declined to comment, citing the office's ongoing probe.
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